can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Randomize
