Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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