Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
