he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
The feeling are messing with the penis
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Randomize
