I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize
