he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Randomize
