sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
