he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize