How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
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