Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Randomize
