Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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