She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
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