guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
