It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
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