Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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