hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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