i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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