Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
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