i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
