CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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