I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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