my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize