Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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