i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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