i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
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