She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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