Taylor Swift is so right about you.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Acid is not a monday night drug
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
