YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
