he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
