Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
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