I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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