I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
