it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Randomize
