She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
