awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
