none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
What did we do last night that was yellow?
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
