we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize