I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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