Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
