I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
