Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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