sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
All the doctor said was why
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
