Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
