these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
