since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize