We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
This is classic penis vs brain.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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