i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
