If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
