So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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