Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
